His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage

From http://tsikot.yehey.com/forums/showthread.php?t=29399

How can a couple prevent adultery? Dr. Willard Harley in his book His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage provides some answers. He has
found that marriages that fail to meet a spouse's needs are more vulnerable to an extramarital affair.
Often the failure of men and women to meet each other's needs is due to a lack of knowledge rather than a selfish unwillingness to be considerate.
Meeting these needs is critically important because in marriages that fail to meet needs, it is striking and alarming how consistently married people seek to
satisfy their unmet needs through an extramarital affair. If any of a spouse's five basic needs goes unmet, that spouse becomes vulnerable to the
temptation of an affair.

First, let's look at the five needs of a wife. The first need is for affection. To most women affection symbolizes security, protection, comfort, and
approval. When a husband shows his wife affection, he sends the following messages: (1) I'll take care of you and protect you; (2) I'm concerned about the problems you face, and I am with you; (3) I think you've done a good job, and I'm so proud of you.

Men need to understand how strongly women need these affirmations. For the typical wife, there can hardly be enough of them. A hug can communicate all of the affirmations of the previous paragraph. But, affection
can be shown in many ways such as: kisses, cards, flowers, dinners out, opening the car door, holding hands, walks after dinner, back rubs, phone
calls…there are a thousand ways to say "I love you." From a woman's point of view, affection is the essential cement of her relationship with a man.

The second need is conversation. Wives need their husbands to talk to them and to listen to them; they need lots of two-way conversation. In their dating
life prior to marriage, most couples spent time showing each other affection and talking. This shouldn't be dropped after the wedding. When two people get married, each partner has a right to expect the same loving care and attention that prevailed during courtship to continue after the wedding. The
man who takes time to talk to a woman will have an inside track to her heart.

The third need is honesty and openness. A wife needs to trust her husband totally. A sense of security is the common thread woven through all of a woman's five basic needs. If a husband does not keep up honest and open communication with his wife, he undermines her trust and eventually destroys her security. To feel secure, a wife must trust her husband to give her accurate information about his past, the present, and the future. If she can't trust the signals he sends, she has no foundation on which to build a solid
relationship. Instead of adjusting to him, she always feels off balance; instead of growing toward him, she grows away from him.

Financial commitment is a fourth need a wife experiences. She needs enough money to live comfortably: she needs financial support. No matter how successful a career a woman might have, she usually wants her husband to earn enough money to allow her to feel supported and to feel cared for.

The fifth need is family commitment. A wife needs her husband to be a good father and have a family commitment. The vast majority of women who get married have a powerful instinct to create a home and have children. Above all, wives want their husbands to take a leadership role in the family and to commit themselves to the moral and educational development of their children.

Preventing Adultery: His Needs
Now, let's look at the five needs husbands have. The first is sexual fulfillment . The typical wife doesn't understand her husband's deep need for sex anymore than the typical husband understands his wife's deep need for affection. But these two ingredients can work very closely together in a happy, fulfilled marriage. Sex can come naturally and often, if there is enough
affection.

The second need for a man is recreational companionship. He needs her to be his playmate. It is not uncommon for women, when they are single, to join
men in pursuing their interests. They find themselves hunting, fishing, playing football, and watching sports and movies they would never have chosen on
their own.

After marriage wives often try to interest their husbands in activities more to their own liking. If their attempts fail, they may encourage their husbands
to continue their recreational activities without them. But this option is very dangerous to a marriage, because men place surprising importance on having
their wives as recreational companions. Among the five basic male needs, spending recreational time with his wife is second only to sex for the typical husband.

A husband's third need is an attractive spouse. A man needs a wife who looks good to him. Dr. Harley states that in sexual relationships most men find it nearly impossible to appreciate a woman for her inner qualities alone--there must be more. A man's need for physical attractiveness in a mate is profound.

The fourth need for a man is domestic support. He needs peace and quiet. So deep is a husband's need for domestic support from his wife that he often
fantasizes about how she will greet him lovingly and pleasantly at the door, about well-behaved children who likewise act glad to see him and welcome him to the comfort of a well-maintained home.

The fantasy continues as his wife urges him to sit down and relax before taking part in a tasty dinner.Later the family goes out for an evening stroll, and he returns to put the children to bed with no hassle or fuss. Then he and his wife relax, talk together, and perhaps watch a little television until they
retire at a reasonable hour to love each other. Wives may chuckle at this scenario, but this vision is quite common in the fantasy lives of many men. The male need for his wife to "take care of things"--especially him--is widespread, persistent, and deep.

The fifth need is admiration. He needs her to be proud of him. Wives need to learn how to express the admiration they already feel for their husbands
instead of pressuring them to greater achievements. Honest admiration is a great motivator for men. When a woman tells a man she thinks he's wonderful, that inspires him to achieve more. He sees himself capable
of handling new responsibilities and perfecting skills far above those of his present level.

If any of a spouse's five basic needs go unmet, that person becomes vulnerable to the temptation of an affair. Therefore, the best way to prevent adultery is to meet the needs of your spouse.

MMSC Settings

Got these from http://blog.nowsms.com/2008/06/mobile-operator-mmsc-settings.html:

[Philippines - Globe]
APN=mms.globe.com.ph
WAPGateway=192.40.100.20
MMSURL=http://192.40.100.22:10021/mmsc

[Philippines - Smart]
APN=mms
WAPGateway=10.102.61.46
MMSURL=http://10.102.61.238:8002/

[Philippines - SUN / Digitell]
APN=mms
WAPGateway=202.138.159.78
MMSURL=http://mmscenter.suncellular.com.ph/

Thinkvantage Password Manager and Firefox 3

Woohoo! I found the solution here!

1. Find tvtpwm_moz_xpi.xpi in Client Security Solution install directory (C:\Program Files\Lenovo\Client Security Solution)
2. Open it using your fav zip program (I used 7-Zip)
3. Change install.rdf and update 2.0+ to 3.0+
4. Open chrome/tvtpwm.jar
   
5. Edit content/tvtpwm.js and replace window.addEventListener("load", onLoad, true); with following:
   window.addEventListener("load", function () { gBrowser.addEventListener("load", onLoad, true); }, false);
   
6. Now install tvtpwm_moz_xpi.xpi. You can do this by opening "Add-ons" window (Tools/Add-ons menu) and drag-and-drop xpi file in it.

Preventive Car Maintenance (DIY)

Things To Check and Do Weekly


Things to check:

Radiator coolant. Check the plastic overflow bottle, attached by a hose to the radiator. if the level is below the Full mark, add water and antifreeze in equal amounts. If the level keeps dropping, check for leaks.

Oil Level. park the car on level ground wait a few minutes. Then pull out and wipe the dipstick and reinsert it. If the level is below the Add line, add enough oil to bring the level to Full mark. Don't overfill.

Things to do:

Keep the body clean. Dirt and pollutants are tough on paint. Wash the car every week, using enough water to avoid scratching the paint. Hose out the fender wells and undercarriage with a strong spray to dislodge accumulated dirt and road salt, which can cause corrosion. When water beads on the body panels become larger than a quarter, wax the body to protect the paint from tree sap, bird droppings and other damaging dirt.

Things to Check Monthly

Things to check:

Tire pressure. Check with an accurate gauge when the tires are cold. (Don't trust the air-pump gauges at service stations, as they tend to be very inaccurate.) See your car owner's manual or label in the glove compartment or on the driver's doorpost for recommended pressures. And don't forget the spare.

Automatic transmission fluid. Check the fluid level and color, using the transmission dipstick (See the owner's manual for details.) If the level is low, add fluid to between the Add and Full marks. If the fluid is brown or black or smells burnt, change the fluid and filter. If the fluid is sickly white or pale, the transmission oil-cooler may need repair.

Power steering fluid. check the level with the dipstick (usually attached to the fluid reservoir cap). If the level is low, top it up and have the system checked for leaks.

Brake fluid. Check the level in the master cylinder. (Wipe the cap clean before removing it.) If the fluid level is low, top it up and have the system checked for leaks.

Battery. On a low-maintenance battery, pry off the covers or unscrew the caps. If necessary, add distilled water. If the battery has an "eye", check its color. If the eye is green or blue, the battery is OK. If it's black, have the battery tested and charged. If it's pale or yellow, replace the battery.

Things To Check and Do at Each Oil Change


Things to check:

Tires. Check for cuts and bulges, signs of an imminent blowout. Don't worry about fine surface cracks.

Differential fluid. On rear-wheel-drive cars, remove the plug in the differential and feel for fluid with your little finger. If you don't feel any, add fluid until you can and have the system checked.

Air filter. Remove the air-filter cover and hold the filter up to the sun or a bright light. If you don't see light through the element, replace the filter.

Cooling-system hoses. At each oil change, squeeze the hoses when the engine is cold. Replace the hoses if you find cracks or hard or mushy areas. Then start the engine and watch the hoses. Replace them if they bulge while the engine is running.

source: motorzone.com.my


Car Breakdown Prevention

Breakdowns Can Be Very Annoying

Don't let a highway breakdown ruin your trip to balik kampung. Be prepared, to help increase your chances of arriving on time and safe and sound. Preventive maintenance is a must. A well maintained vehicle is more enjoyable to drive, will last longer, and should command a higher resale price.


Read your owner's manual and follow the manufacturer's recommended service schedules.

Engine Performance -- Get engine driveability problems (hard starts, rough idling, stalling, diminished power, etc.) corrected at a good repair shop. Replace dirty filters (air, fuel, PCV, etc.).

Fuel -- Note that a gas tank that is kept filled helps keep moisture from forming.

Oil -- Change your oil and oil filter as specified in your manual -- more often if your driving is mostly stop-and-go or consists of frequent short trips.

Cooling System -- The cooling system should be flushed and refilled as recommended. The level, condition, and concentration of the coolant should be checked periodically. Never remove the radiator cap until the engine has thoroughly cooled! The tightness and condition of drive belts, clamps, and hoses should be checked by a pro.

Windshield Wipers -- Replace old blades. U know lah here in malaysia it rains lembu and gajah even worse than raining cats and dogs..


Battery -- The only accurate way to detect a weak battery is with professional equipment. Routine care: Scrape away corrosion from posts and cable connections; clean all surfaces; re-tighten all connections. Avoid contact with corrosive deposits and battery acid. Wear eye protection and rubber gloves. If battery caps are removable, check fluid level monthly. Note that removal of cables can cause damage or loss of data/codes on some newer vehicles, so be sure to check your manual.

Lights -- Inspect all lights and bulbs; replace burned out bulbs; periodically clean road grime from all lenses. To prevent scratching, never use a dry rag.

Exhaust System -- Your vehicle should be placed on a lift and the exhaust system examined for leaks. The trunk and floorboards should be inspected for small holes. Exhaust fumes can be deadly.

Tires -- Examine tires for remaining tread life, uneven wearing, and cupping; check the sidewalls for cuts and nicks. Check tire pressure once a month. Let the tires "cool down" before checking the pressure. Rotate as recommended. Don't forget your spare, and be sure the jack is in good condition.


Emergencies -- Carry gloves, boots, blankets, flares, a small shovel, sand or kitty litter, tire chains, a flashlight, and a cell phone. Put a few "high-energy" snacks in your glove box.
Yeah keep some ''safety rubber glove'' too , u never know when u might need it..

Windows XP BSOD

I've had enough!!!

This particular workstation cannot stay up for 3 full days!! :-(

When it had only 512MB RAM, I timed it and it couldn't last more than 18hours. Now that it has 2GB RAM, it can stay up for more than 48 hours. I haven't timed it on 2GB RAM yet.

I am pretty sure that this problem is related to VIATXT's SUPERLOAD software. This software was written on VS.net. I know this for a fact, because I've already set up dozens of computers with the same configuration, and without this SUPERLOAD program, they do not suffer crashes like this one does. AFAIK, these crashes occur EVEN AFTER SuperLoad has closed.

Here's the manifest.txt contents:

Server=watson.microsoft.com
UI LCID=1033
Flags=1696082
Brand=WINDOWS
TitleName=Microsoft Windows
DigPidRegPath=HKLM\Software\Microsoft\Windows NT\CurrentVersion\DigitalProductId
ErrorText=A log of this error has been created.
HeaderText=The system has recovered from a serious error.
Stage2URL=
Stage2URL=/dw/bluetwo.asp?BCCode=f4&BCP1=00000003&BCP2=8A1864E0&BCP3=8A186654&BCP4=80604528&OSVer=5_1_2600&SP=2_0&Product=256_1
DataFiles=C:\DOCUME~1\xxxxx\LOCALS~1\Temp\WER8d0c.dir00\Mini061308-01.dmp|C:\DOCUME~1\xxxxx\LOCALS~1\Temp\WER8d0c.dir00\sysdata.xml
ErrorSubPath=blue
DirectoryDelete=C:\DOCUME~1\xxxxx\LOCALS~1\Temp\WER8d0c.dir00

Screenshot:

Getvat new look

Yes! I managed to do it in less than an hour:

I improved getvat2.php to display additional fields at the top of the page: METER #, CONSUMER CLASS, ADDRESS and removed the first bill's details, since they will be included in the table below anyway.

The table now has no more SYSLOSS, AGRA, TRAM VAT amounts, and has followed Gina's Report format:

BILL/READING					UNIV. CHARGES		VAT Amount
Month	Bill No.	Rdg. Date	Reading	KWH	ME	EC	Gen.	Trans.	Dist.	Bill Amt.
2008-02	2716258	2008-02-20	3261	0	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.30	2.81
2008-03	2771587	2008-03-21	3261	0	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.30	2.81
2008-04	2836147	2008-04-21	3261	0	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.00	0.30	2.81
2008-02	2898884	2008-02-20	3317	56	2.09	0.14	16.69	8.19	0.00	258.13
2008-03	2898885	2008-03-21	3373	56	2.09	0.14	18.40	8.90	0.00	247.60
2008-04	2898886	2008-04-21	3429	56	2.09	0.14	18.09	8.45	0.00	242.33
2008-05	2898887	2008-05-21	38	56	2.09	0.14	21.24	5.68	0.00	239.09

Cool, 'no? :-)

Illegal Connections

Finally, I was able to modify the Ledger and Teller modules to FLASH THE STATUS of the consumer when it's current status is "ILLEGAL", whether or not it is ACTIVE or INACTIVE.